I Won’t Settle

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Listening to Lecrae’s “The Fever” this morning. Contemplating. Next, I switch it up to his “Round of Applause.” Looks like he did a collaboration with B. o. B. Now, that’s just jolly! I like listening to Lecrae on occasion because he has a habit of cutting through the noise when I just need to focus and get my head straight. He also inspires me to remember that when I write, I am to speak truth in love and not simply aim to people-please and echo everything else that’s out there. He’s got this one song called “Nuthin'” that gets me big time.

I’ve been exposed to a whole lot of trap rap this past year—which on the whole has been a bit . . . traumatizing. It’s stuff my co-workers grew up with, so I get it. But I also don’t. Most of them are women and if some dude came up and starting talking to them like that, I am genuinely concerned I would lose it on the guy. Never was a fan of hearing guys call women the crude names associated with female dogs and street-walkers.

Lecrae calls the crap out. Encourages rappers and hip-hop artists to go higher with their music—not to sell out and objectify women. Healing balm for my soul. Thank. You. Sir.

I’m walking through some forgiveness stuff right now. Got a long story with a whole lot of pain in it. Young men, old men. Belittling. Sexual harassment. Emotional and spiritual manipulation. The leer. Worship songs in which the Bride of Christ is expected to call herself a “whore” in the name of some twisted version of “humility.”

“You can’t.” “Too sensitive.” “Women pastors???” “You should be flattered; he only does that when he really likes a girl.” “Eve’s fault.” “I just can’t help myself!” “Women should not lead.” “It’s just the way the world works.” “She belongs in the kitchen. That’s how it’s supposed to be, right? Barefoot and pregnant . . .” “Submit.”

Now, try staring all that in the face and still believing that there is good left in men!

I can. I’ve seen it. The glimpses of good here and there have made a world of difference for me. It was my guy friends in college who first introduced me to biblical Christian feminism. Told me I was worth more than how I had been treated by guys in the church and society at large. Got down on their knees and repented for it. Encouraged me to go after my dreams. How they treated me even drove me to get out of a spiritually and emotionally abusive relationship!

They set the standard pretty high. When I’m tempted to settle or let things slide, those memories pop up. I remember that Jesus Christ was and is the O. W. A. (Original Women’s Advocate). I see what men could be if they remembered who they actually are—even when they appear too beaten down by those negative words and male stereotypes to even see the good in themselves.

I CAN’T SETTLE. I won’t settle.

Like ammo in my back pocket, I got testimonies.

“Boys will be boys.” LOL.

BS.

Here’s your mirror, bro. Take a long hard look at it. You see Jesus? Yeah, He’s supposed to be there. That’s your original blueprint. Believe it!

 

Til next time,

The Joy Detective

 

 

 

 

 

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